There is no nice day to the death

All the same which day would be it in the year:
1.1. or 31.12.: who wants to go already for (supposed) always?!
Take from me my faith not to this
What could be
If it was possible then
Or: there is still another light.
Whether in the cold season the death proceeds
Or there a deck chair, on which one would stand in the garden for good
Falls asleep.
I would not know how to say what I would prefer:
To be only or round me friends, my son.
Give to me only a lot of time, around my mistakes
- if these were then mistakes -
To commit differently or not at all
Give to me only time, around more wishes
To see coming true.
Whom I say this?
No, for me there is no charitable God
There is only inside in it in me
Another I which I would be with pleasure
And after which I would like to be directed.